i end up getting angry with myself and my past. i feel stuck, unable to move on... all the time spent moving away from my past seems so short, and the pain is still fresh and open.
my worst fear is that because of my sinfulness and rebellion, God has given up on leading my life and filling it with purpose. This is not true. The bible says that “Everything is possible for him who believes.” Mark 9:23 and “Be patient and you will finally win, for a soft tongue can break hard bones.” (Proverbs 28:13)
and most importantly, my favorite bible quote, “I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ”(Jeremiah 29:11)
so why do i feel like God hasn't forgiven my past sins? "Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy. You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea." (Micah 7:18-19)
my lack of faith and consistent laziness is weighing me down and causing me to doubt God.
my weapon is the Bible, and i must tell my soul to shut up and preach to its skepticisms.
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